Melancholy Moment & I Don’t Know Why …

Do you ever feel like giving up? Or, you feel like you can’t seem to do anything right? Maybe you feel lost and alone? Or maybe you feel conflicted; like you want to follow your heart because you believe it’s the right thing for you instead of listening to your head because it’s practical?

That’s the kind of day I had yesterday. It’s weird because it was a good day. Actually, I had a wonderful week.

After my villain showed up the novel has gained momentum. So much so I was able to start planning the direction of the novel instead of going along for the ride, which is exciting because I haven’t done much preplanning. I wrote new words and drafted an outline.  Yippee. Success.

Every request that came to my desk was addressed or resolved. I won’t return to work after the holiday with issues waiting for me. Well, I’ll have new issues to handle but I left an empty inbox and clear desktop which is rare. Makes me smile.

As far as parenting … I didn’t raise my voice at the boys or blow up. We had dinner and quiet time. I allowed them to resolve their own issues and entertain themselves.

Plus, Wednesdays are family night but thanks to the holiday I’m off from work, so today gets to be Family DAY.  It’s awesome.

Summer is in full bloom. It’s warm and sunny. I can sit outside and get doses of vitamin D.

  • It’s not writer’s block.
  • It’s not job stress.
  • It’s not familial frustration.
  • It’s not bad weather.

Life is good. This state of discontent caught me by surprise. I came home and crawled under the covers to hide from the world for just a little while. Why?

It could be a Dad Day masked as self-doubt and adorned in apathy. It could be fear of failure or success.

Maybe I am suffering from life-is-going-exactly-as-it-should, which means something big and bad is waiting around the corner.

If I follow my heart it could lead me to oblivion. But if I listen to my head I could be on the road to greatness. No matter which path I choose, I refuse to dwell melancholy too long.

I think I’ll buy some flowers to cheer myself up. Maybe I’ll get a new set of pens.

What do you do when you’re faced with melancholy moments? How do you bounce back from times of inner turmoil?

Now my pity party is over.


  1. Phil Hanson says:

    I suspect Family Day in the middle of the week will lift you out of your melancholia. Always works for me.

  2. oooooohhhhhh…this goes straight to the heart. like you, i do my best to find something beautiful to put around me, like flowers. if it lingers, i journal…because i like to get to the heart of the matter and my words eventually reveal my heart’s cry. ultimately, at the risk of sounding all godly and such, i read scripture; it’s the balm to my soul and almost always soothes my spirit. thanks for being real to all of us. it makes us all seem so normal. xoxoxo

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